Rabbi's Message

  • June 26, 2015



    The three week period from Shiva Asar B’Tamuz through Tisha B’Av (observed from July 5th - July 26th) is known as “Bein HaMitzarim”. This phrase comes from Megillas Eicha: “All her enemies have overtaken her between the narrow passes” (1:3). Commentaries explain “the narrow passes” to refer to this three week period of national anguish and mourning. To commemorate this period, and to prepare a Jew for the intensity of mourning on Tisha B’Av, a number of customs have developed. Please note that much of what is included is based upon the rulings of Rav Yosef Dov Soloveitchik zt”l who felt that the time periods of the Three Weeks, the Nine Days, and Tisha B’Av generally correspond to the three different halachic stages of mourning for a parent which are, respectively, the Twelve Months, the Thirty Days, and the Shiva. For Ashkenazim, four prohibitions apply to the three week period (for Sefardim, only #4 is applicable):           

    1) Weddings – engagement celebrations without music, however, are permitted up to, but not including, Rosh Chodesh Av.           

    2) Playing Musical Instruments – this includes listening to live music played on instruments. (During the Nine Days one should even refrain from listening to recordings of musical instruments). It also includes attending entertainment events where music is the primary feature of the program. A professional musician whose source of income is from playing, is exempt.           

    3) Haircuts – should not be taken during this time. Other personal grooming needs, such as cutting nails, are permitted during this period.  Cutting nails is a problem during the week in which Tisha B’Av falls out. For men, shaving is a source of some dispute. There are those who forbid shaving from the beginning of the three week period, except in case of great necessity (e.g. job related purposes). According to Rav Soloveitchik, shaving becomes an issue only during the Nine Days, due to his comparison of the Three Weeks with the Twelve Month mourning period for a parent during which shaving is permitted when a person looks unkempt (which for most people in our culture is going every two days, or even less, without shaving).       

    4) Recitation of Shehechiyanu – important new clothes (that are bought infrequently), household furnishings of major significance, or a new fruit, should preferably not be purchased, and certainly not used for the first time during the Three Weeks. This prohibition is suspended when: (1) there is a great necessity for the item; (2) its first use will be on Shabbos (when it was purchased before the Three Weeks).

    These customs, as well as the prohibitions of the Nine Days and Tisha B’Av, applies equally to men and women. Some are lenient regarding a haircut for a woman in case of great need. Children from age 6 and older should also be trained to observe these prohibitions. However, in regard to haircutting, a child may take one up until the week in which Tisha B’Av occurs.

    L’shana Haba’ah b’Yerushalayim.

    Have a great Shabbos.